Good Girls Finish Right On Time…
Embracing Your Singleness
By Kimberly Usher
“I, with a deeper instinct, choose a man who compels my strength, who makes enormous demands on me, who does not doubt my courage, or my toughness, who does not believe me naïve or innocent, who has the courage to treat me like a woman.” -Anaïs Nin
I’ll come back to this quote….
Embracing Your Singleness - I would love to say that I have the answers to being perfectly okay with being single however, that’s not something I can do. I am a single woman, who God blessed with the capacity to love unconditionally and the desire to receive the same. Love is definitely all we need and the saying is true that we must learn to love ourselves before we can love others. My journey through singleness has been tumultuous and rewarding, yet it has been filled with lessons. While these lessons have created some very trying moments for me, they have given me so much wisdom. These lessons while appearing to be hurtful at the time, have turned out to be useful tools to encourage the use of patience, discernment, obedience and all the things necessary to maintain a successful relationship.
I’m sure you ask yourself why a woman as accomplished as yourself, as loving as yourself, as beautiful and intelligent as yourself, and certainly selfless as yourself, would be single? I’ve asked myself that a million times. In fact, the very man I care for asked me the same question. While listening to Common’s song, “The Light” a verse comes to mind, “Some dude’s recognize the light but they can’t handle the glare.” I kind of think this may be the answer. It’s easy to recognize a good thing and proclaim her goodness to the heavens. It’s another story to have the courage to step to that good thing, put down all one’s bad things, and commit to being good for the rest of one’s life. Knowing that these types of men really do exist, helped me to shape my idea of the man I want to find me. See the quote above by Anais Nin. It’s my prototype. That’s the courage I want to find me. He’s the man I want to lead me. He’s the man I’ll be willing to trust.
With all of this said, what do we do now? Singleness is not all bad. He’s out there. He’ll find you at the very moment that you need to be found. Until then, continue to be patient. Continue to invest in yourself. Continue to love yourself. Continue to treat others right. Live for you. Love people for who they are and not for whom you want them to be. Make decisions you won’t regret. Align yourself with God. Have faith. Believe in love. Trust God’s plan for your life. Enjoy life. Enjoy being single. Wait for the real thing. The worse thing you can do is fall in love with the man you want him to be instead of the man he is. So, think of your singleness as God’s protection.
In your moments of discontent about being single, it’s ok to cry, just remember to pray for peace. Ask God to keep you steady and moving forward. In no way is this thing easy, but taking the road less traveled has never been the fan favorite. You could have settled, but you didn’t and I celebrate you all for that today. So I’ll pray that love finds you and that love keeps you. Lots of blessings.
The material on this site may not be reproduced, distributed, transmitted, cached or otherwise used, except with prior written permission of Myra Wallace, LLC 2009.
Website by MichaelBelcher.com